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M-Taliesin
01-02-2011, 12:44 PM
Howdy Folks!
I'm not precisely sure if I am posting this tale in the proper place, and I not, I do apologize in advance. If a moderator would be so kind as to ensure it finds the proper board for this type of story, I'd be thankful if you'd get it there. I don't see how I can move it anywhere on my own. Again, I apologize if this is the wrong board.
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I've related the tale of Mordachai, and affirm that every word of it was absolutely true as it actually happened. But it wasn't the only encounter I had with Mordachai.

About a couple of months after he assaulted me on a local elementary school tot lot, and his grandmother lit into him with an impressive ire that almost made me feel sorry for the little scallywag, I went to the local supermarket that is situated about dead center between his neighborhood and mine. There were a few items I needed to fetch home from the King Soopers, and I headed over there hoping the store wouldn't be too busy. I like to run in, get what I'm after and get out as quickly as possible. Unlike my wife, who will linger for hours if given the chance, I do the hit and run thing. For my beloved wife, it is like spending time in Nirvana. Same thing happens at the mall. I believe it is for that precise reason she bought me a Kindle for the Yuletide holiday.

But I digress.

I walked into the supermarket and got me one of those little baskets you sling over your arm. I tend to avoid those grocery buggies because I don't think it really is dignified for a man to push one of them carts around. Back when I had some military training, they said one should never been seen in uniform pushing one of those, and somewhere in my psyche, it stuck.

But once again, I digress.

We needed some facial tissues and I was headed in that direction, but since they just love to move stuff around at the King Soopers, I'm never sure which aisle I'd find them in. So as I walked toward the east end of the store, I glanced down each row to see if I'd spot what I was looking for. As I passed one particular aisle, I caught something out the corner of my eye and I had to back up to take another look. When I peered around the endcap and into the aisle, I saw a young kid squatting on the floor with several bags of candy torn open and shoving candy into his cavernous maw as quickly as his right hand could shovel it in. At first I thought my eyes were deceiving me, so I looked closer. As the kid stoked his face with another mittful of candy, I recognized the kid scarfing candy with an obvious look of bliss on his little face. Why, my stars!!! It was Mordachai!

Yeppers. He had the same curly hair that looked almost orange. He had the same crazed look of demonic glee on his little face as he packed candy into his little face. He even had on that same red shirt he wore the day he came charging me on a local tot lot and tried to punch and kick me, along with trying to beat his fists down on my MXT control box to knock it loose from my hands. No doubt about it, the kid in the candy aisle was Mordachai.

Too bad for him that I'd worn sneakers. If I'd been wearing my John Frey boots, he might have heard me coming toward him, but with my sneakies on, he was totally oblivious to my approach as he revelled in a sugar stoked glucose high. I walked slowly and carefully toward him and drew up close behind him. He still was unaware of me coming at him. He was reaching for another bag of candy and about to rip into it when I leaned over and spoke almost directly into his right ear; &quot:daydream:h, just wait until I tell your grandma about this Mordachai!

Again I wished I had photos of his face as it dawned on him that somebody was standing behind him. And the look of alarm when he realized who was standing behind him. That look of angelic bliss was transformed instantly into a look of panic and horror that would have done Linda Blair quite well in that Exorcist movie. The kid almost levitated to his feet in the blink of an eye and started wailing like a banshee. I could swear his little feet were moving before his body actually followed. He appeared to run in place for a second or two, then bolted toward the other end of the aisle like he'd been shot out of a cannon! As he ran from me, that wail grew into a loud and continuous siren of alarm as he ran throught he store, looking to be anywhere other than where I was standing! Anybody else who heard him probably thought Al Queda terrorists were hot on his heels.

I could hear him from minute after minute as I looked down at the pile of opened bags of candy and scattered remains that managed to avoid being devoured and sorta savored that sound of Mordachai's plaintive wail as he crossed the store heading toward the exit. It was clear that he was startled when I spoke, but even more alarmed when he turned and saw me grinning in his face as I spoke.

Several months have now passed since that latest incident with Mordachai, and even now when I reflect back on that particular episode, I can't keep a smile from crossing my lips. I suppose I should feel some sort of sorrow for the little guy, but it just ain't happening. In fact, I'm smiling right now as I consider the memory!

Blessings,
M-Taliesin

RaZR
01-02-2011, 01:37 PM
Are you sure you're not stalking that poor kid looking for payback? rofl rofl
He sounds like a fine young gentleman to me. He was probably just testing those
candies to make sure someone wouldn't get a bag of stale peanut butter cups! :barf:
He probably ran screaming because his grandma said not to talk to strangers and he never disobeys his grandma. :yes:

M-Taliesin
01-02-2011, 01:52 PM
Howdy RazR!
Those are some keen insights I hadn't considered.
As for stalking the kid, I'm pretty sure that ain't my motivation.
After all, how would I have known he would be at the supermarket that day?
And yeah, he's a sterling example of young manhood in the making.
Eventaully he grow up to be an upright, outstanding young felon, I'm sure!

Blessings,
M-Taliesin

Nitro 54
01-02-2011, 05:28 PM
rofl rofl rofl That story is still funny M-T, no matter how many times I hear it.. rofl rofl rofl

DaleGM
01-03-2011, 02:38 PM
Going to have to let Mordachai know where you are now :beatdeadhorse:




:devilish: :devilish: :devilish: :devilish: :devilish: :devilish: :devilish: :devilish: :devilish: :devilish: :angelic:

M-Taliesin
01-03-2011, 06:41 PM
Going to have to let Mordachai know where you are now :beatdeadhorse:


Howdy Dale!
I am trying to keep that a secret. Last thing I need is for Mordachai to figure out where I'm hiding!

Blessings,
M-Taliesin 8)

russellt
01-05-2011, 10:56 PM
you should have told him you are santa clauses brother mel .... that critter would have shaked himself silly :shocked04:stretcher:

Dimeman
01-06-2011, 12:07 AM
That is still funny ( well not for you Mel...) and I can just imagine how he looked when he saw you. :shocked04: :shocked04: