Digging for Kids

[Beefcake]

As you all know, I teach. As a sub, I've gotten to see alot of stuff... great stuff and not so great stuff... Honestly, I've been a bit bummed out this week. I was in the same Kindergarten class for the last 5 days and there is this little girl in the class that has got me pretty bummed out. She's a good kid, very clingy, mostly because I think that she doesn't get alot of attention at home. I first came in contact with her brother who is in 3rd grade when I taught his class. The kids have a very very distinct smell... In fact when I went into the girls room, without even knowing who she was I asked her last name and knew that it was his sister. Poor doesn't even describe this family good enough. The mom and kids were in an accident on Monday night and totalled their van and the kids were pretty bruised up in the process. Her clothes don't fit her and are always tattered and dirty. I don't believe she's had a haircut in a year. She was complaining about her side hurting after the accident, so I took her to the office to get her looked at and the mom didn't have tylenol to bring over to the school for her. She comes to school in a thin zipping hoodie sweatshirt and is shivering when she gets into the school. She is the first student in the building and arrives over 45 minutes before everyone else because she walks to school with her older brother. Today, she complained that her feet hurt as I was tying her shoe and I noticed that her tattered shoes (white thin canvas kind) had holes where her toes were at and they were at least 2 sizes too small for her. The boy is in the same condition and his shoes are also holed and clothes obviously don't fit him. My wife had him in class last year in 2nd grade and he is still wearing some of the clothes that my wife had got for him last year.
What I was thinking... I, along with many of the people in this hobby, stash away our finds of coins and whatever. I know that every community out there has similar situations with similar kids that are truly suffering in every school. I want to help... although, I don't really know how to get it started, but there is alot of need out there. The dirty clad that we find usually just buys us batteries or upgrades in equipment, or just sits around like mine in a jar. I can think of a better use for this coinage that would also promote our hobby. A type of &quotigging for Kids type of thing where it could help kids, get us into yards that we may not otherwise get into, allow us to enjoy our hobby, and help alot of kids that can use a break. I'd like some ideas as to what, if anything, that I can do to set up a type of charity for kids like this, or even have detectorists set up something like this in their own local districts. It's sad to witness this everyday and think about what some of these kids will become, just because of the situation that they were born into. I was just wondering if there is something that can be done with a large community like we have on the forums. Please, no obligations or anything like that... I just would like some direction to try to help.
Brian

[MNDigger]

Brian I just want to start off by saying you have a heart of gold! In my job I too see a lot of kids and families that especially now are struggling just to put food on the table much less have good clothing for their kids. I am not educated enough in charities to give any advice about how to start this up but I do want to commend you on the terrific idea!

I have also always thought that with all the pull tabs detectorists around the country find we could really do some good for charities that collect them. The big one off the top of my head is the Ronald McDonald House but I know there are several others out there that do the same thing and maybe it could be adopted for the Digging For Kids concept!

[Epi-hunter]

That is a great idea Brian. thumbsup01 The hard part would be how to make it directly help kids like the ones you mentioned... there are places like the salvation army and food pantries all over but they don't often reach those who need it the most, for one reason or another.

The only way I know how to directly help those who I know are in need, is to offer the help on a personal level.... for instance, for these particular kids (who I feel very sad for), to 'adopt' them for the holiday and see that they get new clothes, shoes, a few toys. I have done this before and the only problem is, the help is so limited. I am not sure how you could put something bigger into effect, unless you adopted a specific local charity to direct the funds to. Let me think about it some more. Hopefully others will have ideas as well.

[sectshun8]

Brian.

As a teacher I'm sure you are privy to certain information, like, their address. If you were looking to help these two children specifically, my personal suggestion would be, if you can gather enough donations, whether the items themselves, or money to buy them, wrap up everything and leave it outside their door on XMAS (or any day really) and make a phone call from a pay phone letting them know of the arrival. Have an anonymous letter with everything just expressing you felt you might help out a little this holiday season and hope the items are used by the children.

Now, if you are really thinking on a grander scale, by helping ALL the children, you really have your hands full. And as stated, there are many organizations that specialize in those type of things. It's a shame as a nation we even have folks in these circumstances. We can send all the food, clothing, and medical aid to third world countries, but we can hardly help the cases domestically.

Just my $0.02

[del]

that is a great idea Brian , i'm sorry i wouldn't know the first thing about organizing a charity like that .

[RickO]

Beefcake, I know what you mean. I contribute to the local toy collection here and also the Firemen (all volunteer in this town) take up collections of toys and money to distribute food and toys to less fortunate families at the holidays. Certainly I would think most of us work with our local charities. Emptying out the clad jar is an excellent suggestion as a way to contribute. I also go through the my closet and take unused items to the clothing distribution place here. All these things can help. Thanks for bringing this up, and I know your situation must be especially sad, being so close to the kids. RickO

[coinnut]

Brian I feel for you. We all see some little signs of the real need in this country, but you see it first hand and personal. Non profits and charities have lots of rules, I'm sure. It's a big project, but not undo-able. I think the best advice was to gather what you and any friends could afford, take your best guess on cloth and shoe sizes, visit a Salvation thrift store or Walmart and buy and deliver some clothes. That takes care of the immediate need. If you want to tackle the larger problem, then write (or visit) all of the lawyers in your area and present your situation. Ask anyone willing to donate some time or legal services to get you registered and started. This way you can start slow and still have taken care of some of that family's immediate needs. You got a heart of gold dude. I often think that this country needs some real non profit agencies that actually do something like this on that level. Just my thoughts on it. Good luck and let us know what happens.

[Beefcake]

Thanks for all the input guys... It means alot to me!

[OkieDigger]

I think what you're doing is great. There are a lot of needy people out there and it's unfortunate that many of them are kids. I'm a bit of a realist and I can't help but think there's always more to a story than meets the eye. Giving is great and helps the immediate need. Unfortunately it's more like treating the symptoms rather than the cure. Do you know why they're so poor? Are the parents alcoholics? Drug users? Just between jobs? Perhaps some kind of mental illness? Do they not care about the kids? I give charitably year around and I've always been amazed at how many people are where they are because of what they will or will not do. There are actually people out there starving and their kids are starving because they're too proud to take a hand out. There are so many charities out there. Surely they can find some kind of help? Even local churches will help people. By all means, do what you can to help, but if you really want to help, you'll really need to get involved personally. It can be very heart breaking. How far you want to take it is up to you. I commend you and hope that Jesus Christ will bless you should you try to do more.

[Beefcake]

The way I see it, is that sometimes things just happen and some people are just raised that way and it is a generational thing. I'm not concerned with being a therapist to the family and try to cure the ills of the world. I know the dad works in this family, not sure about the mom, but my real concern is with the kids. I learned pretty early on that sometimes you're dealt with crappy parents and there isn't anything that the kids can do about that. I just want to help the kids in a way that will directly benefit them and perhaps give the parents a break in the process. Life isn't always easy, and I can't judge what gets people through their day. It just saddens me that the innocent are the ones who suffer in these situations.
This particular area and especially this town has been downtrodden for generations. The town was a mining town and the people there have never really developed into a really functional society. The average house would sell in this town for about $35,000 and most are very old. In our county there are pockets of people like this that are decendants of Appalacia and coal mining. I don't pretend to understand the type of lifestyle that these folks live, nor would I want to experience it. Most of these kids are born into poverty of the likes which we are not familiar with. Some folks choose to dismiss them as uneducated bums or hillbillies that refuse to help themselves. The parents are going to be what they are, but I can't sit back and let a little girl or boy suffer because of where they were born. Jobs are hard to come by in our area and it's people like this that are the first to feel the pinch. Both the boy and girl in this situation do very well in school and have good heads on their shoulders... Role models are few and far between with these kids. I would like to see some of these kids be able to focus on schoolwork rather than worrying about their toes being cold, feet hurting because their shoes don't fit, or worrying about being laughed at or picked on because they are the stinky kid with tattered clothes. Childhood shouldn't be this hard. I asked the kids today who had internet at their house? We were talking about the Santa Tracker that I share with my kids each christmas eve and it was tough because there are several there that have no access to the internet or computers.

As I said, I wasn't put on earth to chastise folks for what they do, or how they live... I educate kids, help them when I can, and try to be a role model for them. Don't get me wrong, I thought about the same things that many of you may think about drugs, alcohol, etc... Adults are going to do what they want. I want to help in a way that directly affects them and them only. When I was 10, my parents got divorced and we were forced to sell the house and live in a very small single wide trailer. My mom lost over 100 lbs, not because she was dieting, she simply fed us before herself. My dad wasn't paying child support at the time, and my mom was only working part time for minimum wage. I've been the poor kid in class... It's not fun. I switched schools 3 times in the 6th grade and nearly failed that year because of the lack of stability in my life. This is why I do what I do...

[Islandhunter]

Clad for Kids thumbsup01

[coinnut]

The way I see it, is that sometimes things just happen and some people are just raised that way and it is a generational thing. I'm not concerned with being a therapist to the family and try to cure the ills of the world. I know the dad works in this family, not sure about the mom, but my real concern is with the kids. I learned pretty early on that sometimes you're dealt with crappy parents and there isn't anything that the kids can do about that. I just want to help the kids in a way that will directly benefit them and perhaps give the parents a break in the process. Life isn't always easy, and I can't judge what gets people through their day. It just saddens me that the innocent are the ones who suffer in these situations.
This particular area and especially this town has been downtrodden for generations. The town was a mining town and the people there have never really developed into a really functional society. The average house would sell in this town for about $35,000 and most are very old. In our county there are pockets of people like this that are decendants of Appalacia and coal mining. I don't pretend to understand the type of lifestyle that these folks live, nor would I want to experience it. Most of these kids are born into poverty of the likes which we are not familiar with. Some folks choose to dismiss them as uneducated bums or hillbillies that refuse to help themselves. The parents are going to be what they are, but I can't sit back and let a little girl or boy suffer because of where they were born. Jobs are hard to come by in our area and it's people like this that are the first to feel the pinch. Both the boy and girl in this situation do very well in school and have good heads on their shoulders... Role models are few and far between with these kids. I would like to see some of these kids be able to focus on schoolwork rather than worrying about their toes being cold, feet hurting because their shoes don't fit, or worrying about being laughed at or picked on because they are the stinky kid with tattered clothes. Childhood shouldn't be this hard. I asked the kids today who had internet at their house? We were talking about the Santa Tracker that I share with my kids each christmas eve and it was tough because there are several there that have no access to the internet or computers.

As I said, I wasn't put on earth to chastise folks for what they do, or how they live... I educate kids, help them when I can, and try to be a role model for them. Don't get me wrong, I thought about the same things that many of you may think about drugs, alcohol, etc... Adults are going to do what they want. I want to help in a way that directly affects them and them only. When I was 10, my parents got divorced and we were forced to sell the house and live in a very small single wide trailer. My mom lost over 100 lbs, not because she was dieting, she simply fed us before herself. My dad wasn't paying child support at the time, and my mom was only working part time for minimum wage. I've been the poor kid in class... It's not fun. I switched schools 3 times in the 6th grade and nearly failed that year because of the lack of stability in my life. This is why I do what I do...

Absolutely perfect. You hit the nail on the head. Even though we don't want to get suckered, it's not about the parents, it's about giving the kids a fighting chance. That is why you never give money to a family in need. Buy them things, help them, but don't give them any cash to use for drugs or booze, if that is the case. I had a former employee and no matter what i did for him, alcohol always won. But I did manage to ease some of his pain. I also had a temporary worker do a weeklong job for me. I noticed his boots were so tattered, that I couldn't believe they would hold up any longer. I never said anything to him about them. Talking with him about the job, he mentioned to me if it was Ok to be a little late tomorrow. He had to watch his kid for a bit and then he would be in. His timing didn't make any sense, since he had plenty of time to watch his kid and get to work. I finally found out he had been walking to the job site everyday ---it was 4 miles each way. Did I question his background, his reason for no car (or maybe license) his possible drinking or drug use?? Nope. Next day when he got to work, I bought him a new pair of boots. Any man that was going to go that far to put food on his table was going to do it with just a little less stress. Kind of like the children in your situation. If we expect our children to be good, study hard, have manners, etc... they should do it without being cold, hungry, picked on, or hurt. Thanks for getting it Brian!!! thumbsup01

[OkieDigger]

Ok, apparently everyone took my post wrong? If so, I'll just delete it. I guess I'm the only one that actually cares about fixing problems or at least trying and not letting them continue on to cause more problems. Something called breaking the chain.

[Beefcake]

Dale, none of that was directed at you or anything you said... I have the same concerns...

[coinnut]

Hey, no need to delete the post. Most people will agree that this does not address the bigger issue. It is like treating a a cold and not getting the actual virus that causes it. But sometimes all we can do is help the symptoms and not find the cure. Those kids will probably end up like their parents (but not necessarily). They will probably not be their best or keep on track. But for the most vulnerable parts of their lives, they may get a small break, and have less to think about. We can't fix the big problem, but we can dress the wound. It sounds trivial, but for those young kids it means a lot. I personally agree with a majority of your post, but I focused on the more important issue to me - the innocent kids. Please lets not get rid of your post because we are all here to learn and see all sides of the issue. No doubt that many families are their own worst enemy, but the children sometimes don't have a fighting chance. I often wonder how I would have turned out if I had been born in their shoes??

[MNDigger]

I think everyone is making some really good points about the pro's and con's about helping people who are down for whatever reason's. I think it is important to remember that the kids are not the ones choosing to live the way they are. If you can help THEM by making life a little easier at school by not being teased then I say do what you can. It definately is a vicious cycle that needs to be broken and by showing the kids there are people out there that do care about them it just may help break the cycle. I see this type of stuff more than most people in my daily work and sometimes the smallest things to you and I can make a world of difference to a child!

[OkieDigger]

Ok, just making sure I wasn't crazy or anything. Maybe I should start taking my meds again. But seriously, I'm all for helping the kids. I know they don't have a choice. Some of you have met my dad. You'd have no clue today that he was an abusive alcoholic when I was growing up. That and the two and a half packs of cigarettes a day. I know what it's like to watch a parent spend their money on booze and cigs instead of their kids. It wasn't fun, but I know there are a lot of people that had and have it worse than I did. It's not about judging the person, it's about helping them see the light.

[Beefcake]

Well said Dale... We all have our scars and warts. This could go in a few different directions... I'm looking at possibly getting a domain started up such as www.diggingforkids.com that will allow for funds to be directed. The idea of helping a single family may be a bit daunting and uncomforable... perhaps a larger charity like Ronald McDonald house, St. Judes or any other that people could think of may be a better choice and less of a headache for the IRS in the end. This is very much still in the development stage, but I think it will help someone in the long run. The larger charities have much more of a handle on how to best help than perhaps I do... Children all over the country need help, whether they are poor, sick or abused... It's all for the good in my book!

[Beefcake]

As of 12/14...I am pleased to announce that I have received $545 for these kids from members of this and other forums!!!! Thank you all for your generosity!!!
Brian

[Epi-hunter]

As of 12/14...I am pleased to announce that I have received $545 for these kids from members of this and other forums!!!! Thank you all for your generosity!!!
Brian

That's incredible Brian! thumbsup01 Please post here where people can contribute if they so desire.

I have adopted two families of patients of mine from where I work, so kids and I will be doing Christmas for them this year.

I would like to add one more thing. These kids need help all year, not just at the holidays. It is difficult, knowing you can't solve the bigger problem, but it is good to know that you can make a difference for a child and they will remember it.